Why do I live, Why do I suffer.
Please wisdom let me choose a reason. Hitch my hopes onto this wild west horse, something to believe in. Kept the door close, didn’t let the breeze in, the dank smell in here ain’t leaving, oozing, nose squeezing. Precondition to lateness.
I’ll never catch the early bird worm. Vultures cry, circling over heights, ready to retrieve it. With dedication to steal like that, how can I beat it. Defeated, never out, clung to the ropes, bounce back into a right hook. Pain no joke. Suddenly the clouds opened up and the sun shine spoke.
Rise, Rise, Grow.
Two left jabs I throw. Right hook break or take off their nose. Last hit an upper cut. May they forever lay woke.
Laying the Ground work in a moment.
Remember a time you’ve been in a hurry. Waking up, changing clothes. Behind, door closed, Flag down a car, reach the city end. Caught the boat. Next stop coach, bus down the highway. Plugged in phone, charged 100%. Everything continue smoothly. Time go my way. Onward towards destination, we go. Any minute today.
I’m here, doing construction. The way still isn’t paved. Once you reach here. Force break, notice from me and my team. Still going to miss the plane flight. Take a seat seat, is a lot at stake ? The cement mix is doing fine. Coming along it’s way. Been at this for a while. Cement and I need, not stare at each other, we just hear, listen to what the other has too say.
” Mix me some more, Not quite ready to be paved with “
Like a stop sign preventing you from crossing the street. Made by design. Read the situation and weep. You simple ain’t coach busing across this street.
RELAX INTO DEFEAT.
Left there standing
Rained a bit earlier, ground still wet, smell still fresh. Weather didn’t even get in the way. Lots of shade on sunny cloudy days. Imagine if all your hair up and flew away. Caught in hand but, slipped through fingers anyways. Full sentences derived from what to say. Still won’t say a bit. Complaining as a personality trait just doesn’t fit. Puzzle piece from another game, found lost in this. Life style. Forced abs to be ripped. Vain to branch out greatly. Pain in feet, make me stagger, maybe. I’ve been thinking different lately. The puzzle is almost complete. Image being put together leaves me more confused than happy its complete. Upside down or turn around. Pieces like memories needing to be moved. One in hand, seems it will fit here a little loose. What is one to do. Wait here a bit longer. See what becomes of you.
Anything that leaves me hollow, satisfied and complacent.
misguidedly pour my faith in. Tried to replace it. Time, energy, effort, always in use. Never wasted. Resourceful, hard to forget like a fragrance. Placebo pill couldn’t really taste this. Whole lot of positivity enclosing some hate shit. Out in the open, the body belongs to the mercy of the people around you. Use or be used a choose that hangs over everyone since before birth. Use anyone who used me in a desperate attempt to keep my soul. Out in the open I must tread.
No need for anyone to clap. No need for anyone to cheer, as long as my words don’t fall on death ears. Even better if these words can keep tears away from eyes. That’s all. That matters truly. A heart no longer filled with fear. Happy. Switched gears, overly prepared for life, challenges, every passing year. Voice in my head no longer sounds like, somethings someone else said.
I hear my voice instead. The original. No longer mimics the gimmicks. Someone else put me down because, it will no longer be me. Look up in the sky, all blue, with the tiniest of clouds insight. Force it to disappear, just might.
Nah, rather focus on what is blue. Making decisions now. Before it was the smell of hot garbage. Instinctively turning my face sour. pretentiously thought I need a shower right after. Never in control going down the rabbit hole.
Pretentiously still, if my feelings are water, Purposely spill. When it overflows from the flower pot. Clean it up, no big deal.