Counted that same sheep, enough times for my birthday to passed twice. Only the number changes, while the feeling stays the same. Time constantly hyper active, my greatest exaggeration. Never setting down. Hard to allow a smile, to turn around when everything and everyone is stuck in a forward motion. Running too fast, sweat falls off forming a shallow stream. Never to pool. Unlikely to find yourself drowning in an ocean. Especially one of your own sweat, distilled purely by working hard to progress. Staying ahead hoping, we don’t suffocate in the stress.
If you meet me, assume I don’t like to breathe, with the way I pick a topic and never leave. Deep sea diver with nothing to achieve, everything to believe. Under pressure hoping to squeeze the truth out of, me and the situation. Came to be, my idea of “tomorrow”, despite the lack of belief in destiny. When lost, a problem can never be clear to you. Other people as birds, what they see can never be the same as me. Are you familiar with that feeling of being told the same response, over. Writing a new story of your life. One where you no longer get a response at all. Too busy not telling anyone, trouble always finds its way to the forefront of the conversation. I don’t have a problem, didn’t even say shit.
Constantly bringing it up is not another way to face it. I want control. Bringing it up is the way to replace it. To myself, I say this. What reasons do you have to, beat your own reflection. When tired you let another take a shot. Discarded into isolation, step one before punishment. History isn’t the future, yet that’s how you treat it. Learn to accept a new day, change with it. Open to failure is the road we call “success”. People are out there willing to listen. Just do your best irregardless of who or what. When, how or why they contest. Being careful, a dream can turn into a nightmare on the second breathe.